What is heteroflexibility?
“For some people, heteroflexible feels like that, but for others, it’s more of a descriptive label for behavior or even just curiosity, explained Jesse Kahn, the director and a sex therapist at the Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in New York.
“‘Experiences like this have always existed, and the language continues to evolve as people look for words that feel accurate and affirming,’ he said. ‘The word reflects a broader shift toward understanding sexuality as fluid, contextual, and not always fixed or binary.’”
The difference between heteroflexible and bisexual or pansexual
“Bisexuality and pansexuality are more fixed, said Alexandra Askenazi Marcus, a therapist and clinical supervisor at the Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center.
“‘Bisexuality and pansexuality are more established sexual orientations that involve consistent attraction to more than one gender, with pansexuality emphasizing attraction regardless of gender,’ she said.
“‘Heteroflexibility differs in that it often maintains heterosexuality as the primary identity while allowing for exceptions,’ she said. ‘It’s less about identity.’”
Why heteroflexibility is growing in popularity
“Jaunté Marquel Reynolds-Villarreal, another therapist at the Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center, isn’t surprised the label is catching on. The discourse on love and sexuality is changing, he said, and younger people these days are down with the Kinsey Scale.
“‘Younger generations have been more open to viewing sexuality and sexual orientation as a spectrum,’ he said. ‘In the past, we tended to use labels as very restrictive constructs, binding people into specific interests or attractions that just don’t really hold true here in 2026.’”
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More from G&STC director Jesse Kahn on this topic:
What does it mean to be heteroflexible? Is it an orientation?
Heteroflexible is often used to describe someone who primarily experiences attraction to a different gender but has some openness to attraction or connection beyond that.
For some people it feels like an orientation, and for others it is more of a descriptive label for behavior or curiosity. It overlaps with terms like bisexual, pansexual, and queer, but can feel more specific or more accessible depending on context and identity. Experiences like this have always existed, and the language continues to evolve as people look for words that feel accurate and affirming.
Labels can be useful tools, but they are not requirements, and they do not need to fully capture someone’s experience to be valid.
The focus is less on getting the label “right” and more on supporting people in reducing rigidity and increasing exploration of desire, connection, and identity in ways that feel authentic and self-defined.
What does the rise of heteroflexibility say about our understanding of sexuality?
It reflects a broader shift toward understanding sexuality as fluid, contextual, and not always fixed or binary. This perspective makes space for complexity and pushes back against the pressure to land on one static label. It also highlights how social norms shape what feels possible to name or explore.
Why are more people identifying as heteroflexible?
We are seeing more people, especially younger folks, using language like heteroflexible or mostly straight to describe their experiences. This shows up on apps like Feeld but is not limited to those spaces, as broader cultural conversations are making room for more nuanced identities. This may reflect people trying to stay connected to parts of themselves while also navigating safety, stigma, or internalized expectations.